| neewwwwwwwwwwwwwww lj |
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| 11:15am 18/08/2002 |
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ok..i got my new lj..so that means i wont be writing in this one anymore...
it's friends only...so if your not listed as my friend..that means i hate you!
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) tearsonpaper
my new lj name actually has meaning now...
last night i was trying to think of a good lj name...
so i started going through old poems and stuff i wrote...
and i was reading one..and i noticed there were dried up tears all over it..
i guess when i wrote it i was crying.
so yeah...hense i got my new lj name...tears on paper.
k...
add me fuckers.
my new lj owns.
bye project mayhem!
<3 |
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| new lj |
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| 04:15pm 17/08/2002 |
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i'm gonna be making a new lj..as soon as i get a fucking code.
it's gonna be friends only though...no more faget comments for me.
so you'll know your special if your lj is on my new freinds list..
does anyone have a code???
<3 |
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| make wish...top ten regrets.. |
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| 01:39pm 17/08/2002 |
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mood:  flirty music: finch..duhh
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yomama68: u slut i knew it
ciggsinopenair: haha
ciggsinopenair: who you calling a slut hoe?
yomama68: u apperntly. . not only your a slut but your a dumb slut too?
ciggsinopenair: excuse me fuckhead...who are Y O U calling dumb?
ciggsinopenair: you think im dumb?
yomama68: no i was just joking
ciggsinopenair: thats what i thought bitch
yomama68: bitch what?
ciggsinopenair: you best be steppin hoe
yomama68: steppin up fo sho
ciggsinopenair: hi..my name is john and i like it up the ass.
yomama68: hi my name is candy and i suck johns dick for crack
ok..E V E R Y O N E needs to add my friend Bing..he's fuckin hott..
and i love him...so add him! <3 stonerflexfresh
so i dyed my hair today...and damn..haha..it looks hottttttt..=)
it's like burgandy-maroon. it looks niiiiiiiiice. yay!
i'm gonna try and get a pic of it on here...
yay.
ok...cigg time.
late.
<3 |
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| hang overs = shitttttttt |
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| 10:56am 17/08/2002 |
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mood: hung over =( music: nothing
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yeah..i have a hang over. i honeslt think i want to die. my body hurts so much. it hurts to breathe sooooo bad. my head feels like its gonna explode, i am never ever ever drinking again the rest of my life. fuck this.
god someone please fucking shoot me please please please.
fuck you alcohol!
 You Are a Blowjob Queen!
You are a Blowjob Queen. That's right - you are a total blowjob master. You give the best blowjobs in town. In fact, you
could be considered a modern Linda Lovelace. Your reputation preceeds you, but that's okay. Men shower you with gifts to get close
to those lips.
go figure.... |
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| 01:51am 17/08/2002 |
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mood:  drunk music: weezer n shit
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sup fuckers.
its hosking biotch.
well, candy is passed out on her floor right now. whcih is good cuz she was gonna fuckin puke like 5 miniutes agop;
ya wer fuckin drunk, n i cant remember my fuckin password to this shit,. so im on candys.
kyle n alexa r in the livin room watchin some gayass movie, n candys passed out on the floor. so im fuckn bored. i was thinkn bout wakin her drunkass up but shell probly throw up all over me.
so we were all wasted n her room, n fuckn around with shit.
so me n roller dared cnady n alexa to drink this orange liquours,.
alexa took one shot n spit that shit out, shes too pussy to take it.
we poured prob 3 shots of that shit into a glass n candy fuckn downed that shit.
so ya. that means shes pretty fucked up right now.
n im bored. i could really go for some herb right now.
peace fuckers,
hosking |
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| you die i laff: every girl im with always has a small chest |
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| 02:45am 16/08/2002 |
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yeah..
so i'm bored.
i dont know where anyone is...i think everyone is dead.
the highlight of my night was a cigarrette and talking to lovely wesley..=)
me and him are gonna go back to the 60's in my time machine..
smoke out with john lennon and eff...cause that's what we cool people do.
he wanted to go back to the dinosaurs...but i said no.
and yeah...that's pretty much it.
there was something i wanted to say..but i forgot.
maybe it'll come to me later.
wes is the only person in the world that i like right now..everyone else can choke.
ciggsinopenair: MEXICAN!!!!
TiNkErBeLLeY1: wtf?!
TiNkErBeLLeY1: fukk u!
ciggsinopenair: mexican
TiNkErBeLLeY1: fukk u who is this?
ciggsinopenair: MEXICAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TiNkErBeLLeY1: ur fukkin gay fool
ciggsinopenair: MEXICANNNNNNN
TiNkErBeLLeY1: fukk u fool!
TiNkErBeLLeY1: who is this?
ciggsinopenair: MEX
ciggsinopenair: I
ciggsinopenair: CAN
ciggsinopenair: DY
ciggsinopenair: "FOOL!"
TiNkErBeLLeY1: candy u fukkin bitch! fukk u fool, serious fool, fukk u!
ciggsinopenair: hahaha
ciggsinopenair: shut up mexican |
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| 01:50am 15/08/2002 |
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gregplaysdrums: hey
ciggsinopenair: how did you get this screen name?
gregplaysdrums: your live journal thing
ciggsinopenair: you still read that shit?
gregplaysdrums: ya
ciggsinopenair: k, cool. what do you want?
gregplaysdrums: i just wanted to say im sorry
ciggsinopenair: oh god..are you kidding me?
gregplaysdrums: no
gregplaysdrums: i wanna be cool with u again
ciggsinopenair: hahahahahahhahahahahhahaa
gregplaysdrums: alright ill take that as a no
ciggsinopenair:hahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahahhaha
hahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahahaha
gregplaysdrums: sorry for trying
ciggsinopenair:hhahahahahahhahahahahhahahahhaahaahahaha
hahaahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahah
hahahahahahhahahahhahahahahhahahahahhahahaha
hahahhahahahhahahahhaa!!!
gregplaysdrums: ok! i get it.
ciggsinopenair: yeah..you can take that as a no
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
pussy ass bitches i tell you...hahhahahahahhahahahahhahahaha
wow that totally made my night.
bye.<3 |
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| stupid fucking dream... |
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| 11:38am 14/08/2002 |
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i'd like to know why everyone insists on waking me up in the morning.
i can't beleive summer is over. it sucks.
monday we start school...gayyyyy.
i had another weirddd dream last night. it was weirdddddddddddddddddd...
he was in it again...=( i hate when i dream about him..because then i wake up so depressed. i hate it.
dude...i'd talk about what happened last night..but i'll probably get pissed off again.
but i realllllllly hope that doug has the worst hang over in the world! that's waht he gets.
we smoked him out last night after he was drinking..and oh my god. i will never do that agian. ever. ever. ever. ever. ever. ever.
but yeah. i dont really have much to say. i feel like i'm getting depressed again..
i hate it. fucking dream. =(
i talked to rikka last night...i'm glad she was able to vent on me. i know it probably helped her out a little. Rikka i hope you feel better! i love you! <3
and yeah..
last night Ethan called me a bitch. that pissed me off. fuck that.
i'm not talking to him anymore...that was really gay.
ok..yeah..
fuck everything.
bye.
oh..p.s.
last night me and kyle saw a coyotee...
Doug wanted to run after it.
idiot.
we should of let him. |
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| I'm popeye the sailor man... and wayne newton... and i leave for vegas in a couple hours. |
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| 10:36am 13/08/2002 |
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Ok..i am talking to Ethan right now. He called and woke me up this morning...buttface.
it's cool though. I am still pretty tired..but i cant go back to sleep.
last night was fun...I finally got high last night..first time in like 4 days! haha.yay! i was happy. I blazed up right in my room..haha..i was too tired to go outside. but i aired it out, so it's all good.
I talked to Montilongo last night..haha..i love saying his last name..it's a cool last name. well...i showed him my LJ, and he wanted one..haha...so i got him one. everyone needs to add him, cause he's cool, and hott, and he has his dick peirced..haha. hockeystudd
well...i'm reallly really dumb.
i went 4 whole days without smoking bud because i am getting drug tested today...
and last night..i dont know what was wrong with me...i completely forgot about today...
and smoked. haha..figures...i go almost a week without smoking...and the last day i have to stay sober i blazed. oh well...i'll just drink like a fucking ocean of water...maybe it will clear out of my system..haha..probably not though. oh well.
it's 11 a.m. and i get tested probably around 4-4:30. i wonder if i can pull this off..
but i'm candy..i can pull of anything..haha. =)
ok..that's all for now i guess..
ok bye
<3
Take the "What flavor condom are you?" Test
created by bridgette
Find your inner random object! by Emily |
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| stupid dreams... |
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| 01:44pm 12/08/2002 |
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mood:  happy music: midtown
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duuuuude....i had another crazzzzyyyyyy crazy dream last night.
grr...this one really sucked though. it was really long too...but then i got woken up by my music turning on. it turns on everyday at 11:56. and i have noo idea how to change it. it wakes me up like everyday...grr..
so i talked to ethan today! yay! he's a funny boy..and we tried calling nessa but her phone wouldn't ring..grr..
then ryan came over..and i got off the phone. i was still in my pajamas..haha.
it was cute though...i never get surprise visits anymore...=)
he's still here...we're about to go watch a movie in the living room. he wans to see this scary movie one of my brothers friends rented and left here..and i want to watch scary movie 2..haha. we're debating..haha
i'm so pissed...i lost the ball to the gage in my ear...so the gage fell out of my ear in my sleep...and now i can't find it. i can't put a regular earing in either cause the gage is too big..i dont want it to close up..=( grr...
ok...that's all for now. i'm gonna get back to ryannnnn..haha..yay!
ok..
bye<3 |
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| I'm popeye the sailor man, doot doot, i'm popeye the sailor man, doot doot, i'm strong to the finish, cause i eat my spinach, im popeye the sailor man, doot doot! |
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| 03:14pm 11/08/2002 |
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mood: worked up music: reel big fish
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grrrrrr! i'm mad right now. like whoa.
i hate Steven so much right now. he's an asshole bitchface. him and Brian just beat my ass...over a stupid lighter. and now my back hurts realllly bad because he kept flipping me over the couch, and shoving my head into the stupid pillow! grrr!!! he just left..finally...i hope he goes and dies.
Matt has ants in his ciggarettes...eww..that's so gross. speaking of cigg's i need one soooooo baddddddddddddd...i have none. and i have to say sober until tuesday cause i am getting tested. grrr!
but yeah anyways..because steven decided to try and kill me..i was telling him about the whole situation with the faget boys and kyle. He read that gay as fuck comment in kyle's journal..and he didn't really get pissed...he seemed more disgusted than pissed that somoene would say something like that. but yeah...
and no..i didn't "run to my brother"...i was talking to him about the whole situation..and i brought up the comment..and he wanted to see it. so i showed him. and he read all the others...
his opinion on it is that it's all very gay...and i agree it is. it's fighting that shouldn't be going on.
and as of right now...i am no longer in it. i said my words..you said yours...so leave me out of the wholllllle thing from now on. I'm done with it. if you want to settle things out with Kyle...then go right ahead...just leave me and my name out of all of it.
that's my fair warning...and i would call all of you and say this...but i know your all gonna be reading this shit now to see if i say anything else about you.
so yeah...this is not a threat..just a fair warning...
if i catch or hear any of you saying my name again, planning on doing shit to me again, or do anything that affects me or my house or family...then your over. and i dont mean by me..i mean by Steven...and those were almost his exact words.
it's time to smarten up boys..right now. read this carefully..and think about it.
you dont want to fuck with me anymore.
ok..
that's all..
bye<3 |
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| to all you AMATUER headgivers...JUST BECAUSE YOU GIVE A GUY HEAD, IT DOES NOT MEAN HE LIKES YOU. it just means he wanted to get off. Give head for FUN not for love, bitches. that's right. i'm backkk..once again. |
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| 07:30am 10/08/2002 |
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mood: proud music: the vines - get free
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it's so tight when people get your password and fuck with your shit.
yeah isn't that sooo funny???!
yeah, that's right. I'm back. i was never in fucking jail. what the fuck is that shit? i'm too slick for jail.
It's so tight how people talk to you to find out shit and then go run to their boyfriends and tell them everything. like a little BITCH. yeah that's right...A LITTLE BITCH!
it's so tight how people will come wake you up at 6:30 in the morning just to talk shit and not back anything up.
Kyle..me and you own.
hey Greg, why dont you come up to our faces and say all the shit you have your girlfriend tell Kyle. cause Kyle's reallly gonna hit a girl right? your such a pussy ass bitch!
"you can tell candy to go fucking run to her brother and kill herself again"
Hey Greg, why dont you come here and suck my cock after i beat your ass myself! fuck my brother, i'll throw shit down with you my fucking self! I know guys dont fight girls, but in this case it's ok. cause your nothing but a shit talking PUSSY!
your g/f doesn't even fucking like you, and your willing to ruin you and kyle's friendship for that dykey whore.
gregplaysdrums: you can tell candy to go fucking run to her brother and kill herself again
trying not to be: y dont u tell her urself bitch?
gregplaysdrums: o so i can get my ass beat by her brother?
trying not to be: no, so u can get ur ass beat by her slut
RageVSanger: your nothing but Candys kissass bitch
EjakqL8SoCcR24: hahahahahahahhaa!
that's sooooooo funny how you say that now, but when i was in your fucking face did you not say " i wanna keep things cool between me and you, i dont wanna start or have drama with you"....????????
yeah..whos the kiss ass bitch now?!
kiss my ass mother fuckersssss.... i own.
and you know it.
late..<3 |
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| 01:55pm 16/07/2002 |
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mood:  depressed music: Dashboard Confessional
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i talked to nick last night.
i called him. i haven't called him in so long.
i was crying so hard when i called him..i dont think he understood a single word i said. but i dont think he cared...he was really glad that i called him before i did anything dumb. we talked for like 6 hours last night.
it seriously felt sooo good...me and him used to be like the bestest friends in the whooole world...and it felt sooo good talking to him again.
i forgot how nice it is to talk to your TRUE and REAL friends.
i haven't had that feeling in a long time.
we talked about everything imaginable...and i stopped crying about an hour into our conversation. he was telling me about everyone...like josh, and angela, and jon, and jason... and i am trully soo proud of all of them. i used to hate angela for going out with josh...but now i think it is great that they have been together soo long..and i know he is a wonderful guy..and they are soo happy together...and it makes me happy. Jon straightened up..he's back with Brittany...that's so good. I really hope he doesn't break her heart again like he did before...because shes too good for that. but he turned completely mormon and he is going on a mission in a few months...i was like "whoa". jason moved to New York to room with Joey! that's so cool. Joey used to go to canyon like 3 years ago. I'm so happy things are working out for all of them.
Lisa is going to college pretty soon...and Stacey is going to college soon too.
Nick is staying out here for a little while and going to COC.
i told him about the whole situation about beka...and he agrees completley with me...and hearing his advice...really helps me alot. and I am not going to be freinds with Beka anymore. she's not a good friend..all she cares about id herself..and even stillll she doesn't care how hurt i was/am and she still doesn't think she did any wrong.
i'll doubt i'll even miss her. she made me feel like shit everyday she was here anyway.
and i dont want to talk to chris anymore either. they can have each other...
i don't want to have anything to do with either of them ever again...and i am sticking to it this time.
Nick made me feel sooo much better last night. talking to him made me see how much i really missed him and everyone.
Ryan came to canyon today to drop off his sister...and we talked.
i was completely shocked to see him..and he did this really cute thing with his head..and it made me laugh. i can't explain it, but it was cute.
we sat on the stage and talked for about 20 min. then i had to go back to class.
he still hasn't cut his hair...and it's making me mad. so i told him i'm gonna cut it..and he said he'll only let me if we're both completley stoned..haha... so in other words...yes.
i feel so depressed...but in a way happy. i can't explain it. i am happy that everthing good is happening to everyone else...but depressed because nothing good happens or will ever happen to me.
there's someone that i want to talk to soooooo bad that it hurts...but theres nooooo way i can ever talk to him. everyday i am soo tempted...but i dont. because it'll just make me feel even worse...because he wont talk to me..or if he does...it wont be something i want to hear.
i got the picture of me and nate barcalow..and i fell in love with it.
he looks so perfect and cute and sooooo sexy...i wanted to cry when i saw it.
he is too sexy for words.
time to lay on my bed and listen to dashboard....
i've been wanting to do that alll day long..it sounds so nice right now. |
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high